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Mar 31, 2008 11:57 am US/Central
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Ex-Twin Koskie Copes With Concussion Aftermath
Reporting
Mike Max
(WCCO)
Corey Koskie was once part of a special group of Twins. In many respects, he lived a charmed life as a big league baseball player making big money.
But currently, it doesn't feel like that. He's been battling the effects of a concussion suffered almost two years ago. It's mysterious, it's frustrating and it's scary.
He was an anchor during the Twins resurgence, when they owned the division in the early part of the decade. It is with fondness he recalls that first postseason series win over Oakland.
"It was like, 'You've got no chance against the A's.' And then we ended up beating them in five," he said. "That was an exciting series."
He left the Twins and spent time with Toronto then moved on to Milwaukee. On July 5, 2006, his baseball career and his life changed when he chased a foul ball. After misjudging its trajectory, Koskie fell backwards running at full tilt.
"I knew it was going to be close. I went running to a spot ... When I looked up, it was back over here," he said. "I kind of fell backwards ... landed on my side on my shoulder. It felt like I was walking on a sandy beach, you know. It just felt weird."
He had suffered a concussion, and his life has been spinning like it did when he tried to come back -- perhaps too soon -- and sat in a training room in Arizona with a doctor.
"He told me just to lay down, and as I'm laying there, the room was spinning and moving," said Koskie. "I said 'I've got to get up ... I don't like this feeling.'"
Now Koskie is dealing with the reality of a more complex problem: post-concussive disorder, where he just doesn't feel right and he doesn't know when he will.
"I go to the point where I'll start to feel my symptoms and I'll go, 'Maybe it will go away, maybe I can get through this,'" Koskie said. "But then it gets to that point where all of the sudden ... everything feels like it's going fast-motion."
Dr. Rick Abberman, who works in sports psychotherapy, has counseled Koskie and others with similar injuries. According to him, the physical aspect doesn't necessarily take the biggest toll.
"A big part of it is helping them feel like they're not going crazy. That's a lot of it ... dealing with the unknown, but it's also one of those injuries where it's not a visible injury," said Abberman. "Everybody expects you to be just fine."
"You feel like you always have to justify yourself to people, because they just don't get it," said Koskie, adding the adjustment away from being a MLB player has been a difficult transition. "All of a sudden, you've taken a career away from somebody. And then you're not able to process stuff, everything's a lot slower."
And then there is Koskie's family. His wife and three children have watched and waited and hoped. Koskie noted that when his oldest son says his prayers every night, he asks God to "please heal Daddy's head and make the concussion go away."
Koskie was officially released by Milwaukee this off season, and his frustration with the game stems more from teams and doctors not being up to speed on head injuries. He is currently on a mission to help high school athletes understand it.
Meanwhile, Koskie has seen five of the top doctors in the country, and he's making progress. But as Dr. Abberman sees it, what he's going through is all part of the healing.
"This isn't a clear-cut issue. This isn't a clear-cut injury, and we need to trust ourselves. We have to trust what it is we're feeling," said Abberman. "We're not being soft, but that's very difficult for the competitive athlete to deal with."
And he's moving forward with family and faith as his anchor.
"With everything there's just so much uncertainty. I just don't quite why it's happened this way, but I know that ultimately it's happened for a reason," said Koskie.
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